Introduction

Art Work by Doug O'Dell - Running the Edge (An online Fiction Action Novel) Matthew Jacobs, a member of an elite U.S. Coast Guard search and rescue team, finds himself facing the greatest challenge of his life. As a confident and aggressive search and rescue coxswain operating the venerable 44foot motor lifeboats, his job is to do the impossible, but sometimes the impossible can’t be done and he finds himself unable to save the crew of the fishing vessel Marc Eagle during a dramatic rescue attempt. During the failed rescue, he also loses two of his crewmen and very nearly his own life. He faces a loss of confidence and is haunted by the events of that fateful night. His world is further complicated when the former love of his life, the daughter of the skipper of the Marc Eagle, returns from her overseas missionary assignment and reveals a hidden secret, one that could forever tear them apart. Not only must they run the edge of danger presented by the tumultuous waters off the Oregon Coast, they must run the edge of their emotions as they attempt to reconcile their lives. Together they must face a final test that not only challenges their faith, but threatens to destroy them both.

2022/05/09

Running The Edge: Chapter 15 - Confrontation

 

Chapter 15

Confrontation

                Nathan sat alone in a back, corner booth of The Shipwreck nibbling on pretzels. The room as always was filled with smoke and much too loud music. Being a Friday night, the place was crowded with all kinds of characters laughing and shoving at each other. He was oblivious to the noise and commotion. Ruth sauntered over, squeezing her way through the crowd, prying open a path with her hickory cane slapping at several of the trawler crewmembers if they shoved her back. She stopped short of Nathan’s table and waited for him to respond, but he just kept looking forward paying no attention to her.

                “Hey good looking, now aint you a sight to see. What’s going on with you?”

                He glanced over at her and shook his head sideways, “Not now Ruth, leave me alone.”

                “I’ve been leaving you alone, and it aint helping.”

                “I’m okay, I just want to be left alone.”

                “I think not. Nobody comes to my place wanting to be alone. They might leave that way, but they never come here just to do that. Now talk to me. You look like some dead slim that washed up on the beach.”

                “Oh, good grief. Have a seat.”

                Ruth slid in across from his booth and leaned forward. “Let me guess. You’re down about your dad, you’re upset with Sharon, and you’re mad at Matthew, your best friend.”

                “You left out I had to fire Hoke.”

                “You oughta feel good about that one. Hoke’s a brute and not worth getting upset over.”

                “It’s not Hoke.”

                “Well, what then, come on talk to me.”

                “I had a big fight with Matt. Afraid I blew it and well, I’m pretty sure I ended our friendship.”

                “Oh good grief, Just go and apologize to him.”

                “Ah Ruth, it aint that simple. I really am mad at him…more than that, I’m angry for what he did.”

                “What he did! You mean about what happened to the Marc Eagle. Son, from what I can tell, Matt did everything possible to save your dad. You ought to know that, he came pretty close to doing it to until…well…listen, that bar as you know can be deadly, and it turned against him and the Marc Eagle that night. There was nothing he or anyone else could do and the last thing you need to do is blame him for it. What’s wrong with you, you’re better than that.”

                 “I’m afraid it’s too late Ruth. I let my anger get the better of me this time.”

                “Well, if you ask me…”

                “I’m not asking you Ruth.”

                “…if- you- ask- me, I think you’re being a stupid jerk and you should get off your butt, swallow your pride and do something about it. So there, that’s all I got to say.” Before she moved on, JP sauntered over and slid into the booth seat opposite of Nathan nest to Ruth.

                “So...how you doin big guy?”

                Nathan rolled his eyes, “Not now JP…come on.”

                “Well…scuse me.”

                Ruth stepped into their conversation, “Been a rough day JP, come on. We should let him be for now.”

                JP’s expression grew more serious. “Sorry Nate…if you ever need to talk or something, just let me know.”

                “Sure thing…and, I’m sorry JP, didn’t mean to be rude or anything.”

                “Hey, I’m used to it. See ya later.”

                Nathan did not move for another twenty minutes. He just nibbled at the pretzels lost in his thoughts until those thoughts were distracted by loud shouting from across the room.

                “I ought to bust you wide open!” Red shouted as he shoved his chair to one side and stepped toward the much larger Hoke. The two stood, toe to toe but Hoke towered over Red. The room partially cleared making room for the two. JP turned toward them and started to move closer but was stopped by the gathering crowd. Nathan jumped to his feet and bolted between the two.

                “Get lost Hoke.”

                “Get out of my face. I don’t work for you no more.”

                “This aint your fight Nathan.” Red blurted out trying to move him out of the way.

                Nathan refused to back away, and Hoke stood like an immoveable redwood whose expression turned to rage.

                “I won’t say it again Hoke, now get lost.”

                “You of all people defending that big man Matthew Jacobs after what he done.”

                Red tried to throw a punch, but was held back by some of his crewmates and Nathan. Contempt filled Hokes face and he grinned exposing his smoke-stained teeth. “You know what, your dad deserved to die, cause, he was just a stupid old man too, and you’re nothing but a chicken faced coward yourself.”

                Nathan’s anger once again seethed inside of him and he threw a round house punch that struck Hoke across the side of his face. Hoke barely moved by the blow took one step back. Spitting blood from his mouth he lunged at Nathan. Before he closed the distance, Nathan sidestepped and landed another punch to the other side of his temple knocking him down. Hoke tried to get up, but as he did there was a loud “thwaught” that staggered him and he fell to the floor moaning. Ruth stood over him holding her hickory stick.

                “Aint gonna be no more fightin in my place.” Hoke rolled to his feet, and stagger sideways shaking his head. When he realized Ruth was the one who had blindsided him, he started to lunge at her, but he stopped short. Ruth stood between him and Nathan, her arm extended and pressing against Nathans shoulder, the other arm pointed the hickory stick at Hoke’s face.

                “Get outta my place Hoke, and don’t come back!”

                Hoke stood his ground for a few seconds shifting his glare between Nathan and Ruth. “This aint over.” Then stormed out shoving several people out of his way.

                Ruth rolled her shoulders forward and blew out a long breath. Nathan helped her to a chair.

                “How’s that anger working for you now?” he chided her.

                “Oh shut up.”

                “I’m sorry Ruth. Didn’t mean for that to happen.”

                “Well, son you have a tendency to cause bad things to happen whether you want them too or not. Maybe you ought to take a different approach to life before something really bad happens to you. I might not be around next time to pull your neck out of the noose.”

                Nathan patted her hand. “You going to be okay?”

                “Of course. I’ve busted and thrown out bigger thugs than Hoke.”

                “You’re something else, you know that.”

                “That’s what they say…” She placed her palm against her forehead as though she had a headache. “Oh, Lord…I’m way too old for this…I need to retire,” and walked away.

                Later that evening, Hoke skidded his truck to a sliding halt at the top of the Harbor parking area. In a stampede he slammed the truck door behind him. The bottle of whiskey he held was almost empty, yet he managed to guzzle one last long drink, then threw the bottle into the harbor shattering it against the side of the pier. At the far end of the pier floated the ME II illuminated by a series of harbor lights that caught the reflection of the rain being blown sideways. With no internal lights, she sat stone dark.

                “Big mistake, little man. You both are going to pay for this.” With those words he bulled his way down the ramp, along the pier and into the Marc Eagle II.

                He dropped into the lower hold and shoved some loose gear to one side. In the back corner he lifted a locked box hidden behind a tool box and fumbled to open it. Inside were a few papers which he threw away finding under them a small plastic bag filled with a white substance. He cleared the top of the small galley counter and spread the substance carefully working it into a thin line. Using a straw, he sniffed the substance deep into his sinus, shaking his head at its impact. He rubbed his face and shifted his eyes around the compartment as the cocaine infiltrated into his system. With two deep breaths, he inhaled through his nose again trying to activate as much of the drug as he could. Placing the plastic bag into his shirt pocket, he turned and climbed out of the hold.           

Running The Edge: Chapter 14 - The Lighthouse

 

Chapter 14

The Lighthouse

 

                Matt stood a full fifteen minutes under the hot shower, its warmth soothing his soul and calming his mind. Afterwards his stomach felt woozy after having emptied its contents while on the 303 but he did not feel like eating as there was a leftover tightness inside his gut that caused him to feel like a lumpy rock was sitting inside, but he wasn’t sick, just tired.

                He noticed the light was on inside Chief Adams office and reluctantly he knocked then slowly opened the door.

                “Come on in Matt. Did you eat something?”

                “No…not hungry.”

                “Okay then, have a seat.”

                Matt pulled the large cushioned chair closer to the desk and fell into it with a jolt that bordered on complete fatigue. It felt good to sit and allow his body to rest.

                “Matt, I need you to tell me what happened out there. What really happened.”

                “Nothing…we found Harmony and towed her back. It was little rough out, but we made it okay.”

                Chief Adams stared at Matt without responding. “I think there’s more to it than that and I want you to be honest with, if not me, then to yourself.”

                “Good grief Chief, there’s nothing to tell.”

                Chief Adams did not speak. He did not flinch. He held his high ground knowing full well Matt was not telling him the truth. Neither of them said a word. Matt simply fidgeted with his hands and twisted in the chair. He finally threw a glance at the Chief who was just staring at him.

                “Alright. I had a little trouble. I tossed my cookies.”

                “And…”

                He waited to answer, searching his thoughts to secure an excuse, but could find none, “It wasn’t because I was seasick. I was scared,” he quietly said, “I had flashbacks to the Marc Eagle. I keep having them, been having them ever since that night.”

                “Johnson said you almost froze up.”

                “Well, what does he know. We made it back didn’t we.”

                “Did you?”

                 Matt, slow to answer in spite of knowing the truth, refused to acknowledge his fears and tried to find a reason to move past it.

                “I don’t know, maybe I did.”

                “Look son, it’s no shame to be scared. What you went through with the Marc Eagle took an incredible emotional toll on you and to have it turn out the way it did - No one can blame you for feeling the way you do. Your body, your whole mind was affected. What you must do is face up to it.”

                Matt’s head jerked up and he shot a glare at the Chief.

                “So, you’re wanting me to quit.”

                “Didn’t say that. Maybe you should take some quality time off and evaluate where you are in your life. Spend some time with that girl, Sharon. Find out what’s going on inside of you and download some of those fears. You don’t have to quit, but maybe there’s another avenue to take. Another place where your experience can provide a service to others without placing yourself or anyone else in jeopardy.”

                “Sounds like you think I can’t hack it anymore.”

                “Come on…you really think that. You know that is not true. You got 30 days leave coming to you right. Take some of it, take all of it and unload. This place isn’t going anywhere and we can get by without you, for a while. Let your body and mind heal.”

                Matt paused before replying. The idea of taking some downtime had a certain positive appeal to it. “I’ll think about it Chief.”

                “No, don’t think about, just do it.” He opened his drawer and thumbed through several document separators before extracting a form, then he handed it to Matt. “Here’s a request for leave form. Fill it out and have it on my desk by tomorrow morning. I’ll sign it and you’ll be on your way for a break.”

                Matt took the form and nodded before standing to leave. “Maybe it’s time I took some time off…and, and thanks.”

                The next morning before quarters Chief Adams found the completed form sitting on his desk. He quickly scanned it and just a quickly signed it. Matt was to leave the next day for two weeks.

                It was Friday, a normal station field day with early liberty granted for all but the weekend duty personnel. Part of the cleanup duties included maintenance on the lighthouse. On this day Matt took it upon himself to do those chores and so drove up the hill and past the old Coast Guard Station to pull into the parking area next to the tall structure.

The inside of the lighthouse retained the same aroma and ambiance with a subtle background rumble that echoed through the empty chamber. It was one of those, feeling kind of experiences, where should you return even decades later, the sounds and aromas would arouse from within distant memories.  

The spiral staircase took several full turns before it reached the top where it stopped just under the Fresnel Prism dome itself. Here, a small electric motor drove a long shaft that turned the dome so it would rotate around the glowing light. The beams were generated by the prism and focused the two white and one red beam that could be seen for miles out to sea. From this room, one could climb a short ladder into the dome area and step out onto the deck that stretched around the outside of the light’s upper reaches. Here is where Matt enjoyed spending time. It had been far too long since he was here last.

                He felt the lighthouse was a friend of sorts. An intangible one for sure, but a friend none the less. He often wondered what stories it could tell should it ever be able to speak. Even without audible words, it did speak to him and told him of times past when life was simpler. Its beams appeared to arc across time reaching out to grab hold of its past, and fling it forward into new realms yet to come. He only wished he could understand what it was saying.  

As he stood on the deck from sixty feet above the ground, the thick overcast sky created a daytime darkness that allowed the beams to cut through the morning mist. Within a few dozen yards the beams faded away, yet he knew they were still there, still signaling to the future to take heed from the past. A heavy load soon pressed in on him, the kind of pressure that squeezed its way through an unrealized boundary between his desire for reconciliation, and the realization he may never find it. He wanted to surrender to the fatigue hovering over him, but his mind drifted again back to that night. Like premonitions that were bred from vermin, and guided by an invisible hand, he relived the moments he previously could not remember. Within those flashes when he felt a compulsion to huddle close to death, he remembered seeing a face or a man, not an ordinary man, but one clothed in white with his hand extended toward him. He became aware of a familiar voice, but a voice he had ignored. He remembered he voice speaking to him, “It is not your time….it is not your time.”

He remembered choosing to fight for life that night. To fight through the deception death offered him. He realized it was at that moment when his life curved to follow a new path. As his thoughts returned to where he was, he felt as strong of a presence as he had ever felt. It was something foreign, yet familiar, like the voice he recognized, but could not make out who it belonged to. It again spoke through his heart.

                He fell to his knees not from fatigue, but from a revelation of how the voice he was hearing, was from God. He began to sob. “What are you asking of me?” He muttered softly. “I don’t know what to do.” There was no audible answer, just an overwhelming understanding. God was there ready for him to accept the gift he offered. He just needed to release what was holding him back from taking it.

              Footsteps began to echo through the tall chamber which brought his back his attention. When he turned around, he found Sharon standing in the opening to the deck. The wind caught her hair lifting it with a gentle touch tossing it across her face. She seemed to glow with a radiance not unlike the first time he ever laid eyes on her.

                She walked over to him and touched his face. “You’ve been crying.”

                Matt embarrassed, but relieved she was there, slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close. His tears began to flow, but she said nothing, only allowed him to hold on to her with a gentle embrace. For several minutes they stood atop the lighthouse feeling the moment until he released his hold and stepped away.

                “What’s going on Matt?”

                “While standing here, what happened after I blacked out came to me and I remembered something. There was a man dressed in white robe reaching out to me, warning me, telling me it was not my time to die. I think maybe God was trying to get my attention.”

                Sharon smiled and tilted her head to one side with an approving look. As she held his hand she asked, “What is he saying?”

                “He’s asking me to believe in him.”

                “And do you?”

                “I want to, but I feel ashamed, like I’m not worthy.  I’m confused and maybe angry. Nate and I had a big fight, I’ve lost my best friend, so much has happened. I almost froze out there yesterday on a routine run…and losing your dad, my crew, I just can’t seem to let go of it. What’s happening to me?”

                She paused before speaking not wanting to interject anything into his moment of revelation. “I won’t push you Matt, because God already knows how to approach you. You’ll find him, I know you will, and if you ever want to talk about it, I’ll always be available. Maybe you just need a little more time.”

                He nodded and wiped his face, “I’m sorry for all this, it’s not like me to get so emotional.” He swallowed a deep breath and regained his composure. “We better head down. I need to get back to the station before they come looking for me.”

                “Before we do, I have someone I want you meet.”

                When they reached the bottom of the spiral staircase and stepped out the side entrance, Sharon’s car was parked next to his Jeep. Inside he could see another person and a child. The door opened and both stepped out. A beautiful young girl ran up to Sharon and grabbed her leg.

                “Matthew, this is Nicki. Nicki, say hello to Mr. Matthew.”

                “Hello mister Matthew, my name is actually Nichol, but mommy calls me Nicki.”

    Matt looked at Sharon and then knelt lower to look into Nicki’s eyes. They were Sharon’s, they were beautiful, and within her face he saw imagines of himself. This little girl stole his heart. From deep inside he knew he loved her from that first moment. He could not find words, he simply gazed into her perfect, familiar face, then inelegantly said, “Nicki is such a pretty name. So, how old are you?”

                “I’m five. How old are you?”

                He chuckled, “Well let’s just say I’m older than you are for now.”

                Matt stood tall again and glanced over at Sharon’s friend. “I’m Sandy, Sharon’s friend from overseas. I am so happy to finally meet you.”

                “Yes, yes same here. Listen, I have to get back to the station to finish up the morning. Can we meet someplace afterwards? Maybe go for some ice cream or something.”

                “Nicki’s eyes lit up, “Yeah, ice cream.”

                “Okay, then it’s a date.”

                It was past noon before Matt returned to the station and by then the rest of the non-duty crew had already been released for the weekend liberty. Chief Adams was still in his office when Matt stepped in. “Chief, I’m taking my leave early. I’m leaving this afternoon.”

                The Chief stopped what he was reading and tossed an approving glance toward him. “I’m good with that, where are you going?”

                “To get some ice cream.”                             

                Matt all but dashed out the front entrance. As he did so, Patterson on comm watch stepped up to the comm office window and shouted. “I like strawberry…Matt…strawberry.”

Running The Edge: Chapter 13 - The Harmony

 

Chapter 13

The Harmony

The Next Day

 

                Matt lumbered across the ramp and into the boathouse stopping in the paint preparation room that overlooked the inside of the boathouse. Tied to either side of the short dock sat the 44331 and the newly refurbished 44303, both gently rocking against the shallow swells that filtered through the front of the structure. A stiff breeze swirled around inside the housing area where several of the deck crew were working on the hull of the 331 which, in comparison to the newly refitted 303, looked somewhat worse for wear.

Corrosion caused dull streaks of brown to create uneven stripes to spill down her flanks and the crew could be seen sanding and preparing the surface to apply a new touchup coat of vinyl white paint. In most cases the sanded surface required a new layer of a primer called Blue Death so the vinyl paint would stick without curdling. Sometimes a crewman would often try to hurry the job and do it without the primer. In most cases they could get away with it. Sometimes the vinyl paint would curl after a short delay as it dried.

                Matt made his way down the ramp to the docking area, stepped into the lower well of the 331 an inspected a recently touched up location. The paint had curled.

                “Who worked on this area?” He shouted not directing his voice to any one person.

                BM3 Conners, a twenty-two- year old Boatswains mate who handled many of the routine deck maintenance duty rosters, stepped over and took a look. He ran his hand over the crinkled surface of the poorly done paint job, then motioned to Seaman Andrews to come over.

                “You do this.”

                Andrews grimaced when he noticed the crinkled paint. “Yeah, crap. I thought it would hold.”

                Matt stuck his finger in his face, “Do it again and do it right, or no liberty. Got it.”

                Andrews looked at Conners for support who didn’t respond, then he shifted his gaze back to Matt. “Okay Matt. I got it covered.”

                “Just do it.” Matt turned to address the entire deck crew. “I’m tired of all this slacking off. Get your act together or I’ll put you all on report.”

                He doubled timed his way up the ramp and left.

                Conners placed his hand on a despondent Andrew’s shoulder. Andrews ask, “What’s eating him. Good grief you’d think I had gone AWOL or something.”

               “Don’t worry about it. Just fix it and it’ll be alright. Matt’s been through a lot. He’ll get over it. Not like him to get upset over something as insignificant as this.” Andrews knelt closer to the affected painted area and began sanding again shaking his head while doing so.

                Matthew stepped into the Chiefs office to find him staring out the window. In his hand he held a weather report for the next 48 hours. Chief Adams turned away from the window and returned to his desk and handed the report to Matt.

                “We’re in for another big blow. Already starting to build and continue to do so on into late in the evening. We will most likely have to close up the bar again.”

                “Better let all the trawler skippers know.”

                “They know, that’s why they are all heading back in today before it blows up. The bar is already starting to act up but the main channel is clear. If they make back in before the tide changes, they should be okay.”

                Matt didn’t say anything, he just stood there staring at the weather report. In the back of his mind he could see the bar rolling and collapsing in on itself. The Chief saw through his blank stare.

                “What’s eating at you Matt? You look like a country and western song about a guy who just lost his best friend.”

                He shook his head left and right before answering, “I think maybe I just did.”

                “Want to talk about it?”

                “No.”

                “Alright then. Maybe you should take some real time off. Regroup. Take some leave and get away for a while.”

                “That wouldn’t help. Besides, I’ve been away too long already. What I need is to get back into the saddle and do something that matters.”

                Before the Chief could respond the comm watch stepped into the office.

                “Chief, the Harmony skipper, Joe Brown, is on the radio. Looks like their engines are overheating and they are afraid they will breakdown if they keep pushing them. The seas are running 15 up to 20 feet creating some issues for them. They need a tow.”

                “How far out are they?”

               “Said they were 15 miles out and about 20 miles north. They are drifting at idle to maintain the bow into the wind. Wind is out of the northwest at 25 knots.”

                Matt and Chief Adams entered the chart room and using calipers and a straight edge they began to calculate the Harmony’s drift and an intercept point.

                Drift is calculated by using the formula Speed = Distance / Time. Determining the advance position, the set and drift are factored in. Using dead reckoning, the intercept position can be determined with a reasonable degree of accuracy. Matt did some quick calculation, took a bearing off the number 2 buoy outside the bar, drew a line with a grease pen, and made an X at the calculated intercept location.

                “Let me take her Chief.”

                Chief Adams stepped back and tossed a surprised look. “I don’t think so Matt, not this time. You’re not ready.”

                “What’s that supposed to mean?”

                “It means you’re not ready yet. The doctor said no active duty missions until he clears you.”

                “Doctor’s, what do they know. We’re wasting time Chief.”

                Chief Adams shook his head and hesitated. All he saw was uncertainty. Against his better judgment, he blurted out,

                “Alright, pick your crew. Take the 303. It will be a good shake down mission, and Matt, just be careful.”

                Matt clinched his fist snapping it in front of him like a basketball player who had just made the winning shot. He again clambered down the ramp into the boathouse. He snapped at EN2 Johnson, “Light off the 303. We’re heading out. Andrews, forget the paint, let’s go.”

                Within one minute, the 303’s engines were rumbling, but the boat was still secured to the dock. Matt stepped into the coxswains flat and stiffly lifted himself into the driver’s chair. His ribs jabbing at his side as he had to bend slightly to get into the chair. He pulled his ball cap down tighter, and repositioned his jacket around his shoulders. It felt good to be in the driver’s seat again. He motioned to cast off the lines and Andrews tossed the last line onto the dock. Matt pressed the throttles forward a few inches to idle out of the enclosure blowing the 303’s horn in the process to warn other vessels that might be coming around the corner out of sight.

                “Station Umpqua River. CG44303 underway.”

                The Comm Watch entered the event into the stations log.

By the time the 303 reached the bar, three other trawlers had already crossed over and two others were waiting outside waiting their turn. Across the North Spit and middle ground, 12foot breakers were rolling, but the main channel was mostly open with only an occasional small breaker rising up. Matt throttled back as he surveyed the crossing. The other two trawlers were waiting for him to come out before they tried to come in.

                With confidence the channel was open, he pressed the throttles full forward, the 303 dug into the swells and plowed through the crossing without incident, angled toward the number 2 buoy, then turn northwest, setting an intercept course that corresponded with the calculated drift of the Harmony.

                Andrews sat on the right where the radar was located while Johnson stood in front of the forward compartment entrance hatch where he could easily drop into the engine room should he need to. The wind created a great spray to fly across the windshield as they road over the tops of each swell. The farther out they motored, the bigger the swells became and the force being thrown against the 303 caused it to roll and pitch more like a slow-motion bronco than a boat. Matt’s ribs stabbed at him as they rolled over every swell, but he said nothing to complain.

                Andrews had been here before, but this would be his longest and most difficult SAR mission. “Kind of nasty out today.” He said trying to break some of the tension of the moment.

                Matt nodded but did not say anything. Johnson cast a long questioning look at Andrews as though he wasn’t sure Matt was not yet up to the task. A few months ago, there would have been no doubts. But now after all Matt had been through, he wasn’t sure how ready he was.

                 The 303 lunged upward at a steeper angle than before then slammed hard against the backside of the swell. What were reported as 12-foot swells, we now easily 15 feet multiplying the force by two.

                Matt glared forward rarely wavering his vision to either side. He subconsciously spun the large wheel to keep the compass on the correct heading. An hour and half after they left the number 2 buoy, the sky began to close in on them and visibility turned into a haze, which in turn became a common blend of sky and water with barely a discerning break between the two. The relentless swells stirred the ocean into boiling caldron with no rhyme or reason to its motion.

Matt’s head began to spin into a vertigo induced sense of disorientation. The front of the 303 and ocean seemed to extend forward distorted out of context from what his mind expected and what his eyes were experiencing.

                He closed his eyes. Rubbed his face with a wet hand. His insides began to churn into a nauseated bile, and his skin turned pale. He yelled at Johnson, “Take the wheel…take it.” Then he lunged into the lower well and bent over the side vomiting with a violence of someone in complete internal distress. Two, then three times he wretched. Then a fourth time until nothing else came out except a thin yellow slime before he stopped. He remained silent, pale with a green hue across the back of his jaw area behind the ears.

                  Andrews stepped into the lower well. “Hey man…you okay?”

                Matthew, slow to respond, took a deep breath and allowed the spray exploding off the bow to hit him in the face which provided a refreshing splash. After he wiped himself partially dry, he said, “Yeah, I’m okay. Guess I got a little seasick.”

                “That can happen,” Andrews said trying to reassure Matt knowing full well he had never been seasick before.

                “No…I’ll be alright. Turn on the radar and see if you can spot Harmony. We should be getting close.”

                Andrews climbed back into the coxswains flat and removed the radar cover. Flipping a couple of switches, he peered into the cone shaped screen covering to see if he could see any blips. All he saw was a myriad of indiscriminate echoes bouncing off the swells as they tossed for miles around them.

                “Man, what a mess.”

                “What have you got?” Matt questioned as he struggled to keep the 303 pointing into the swells.

                “Not much, just a jumbled mess.”

                “Try a longer-range setting.”

                Andrews flipped to the 10-mile setting and the blips died down. In their place he saw one solid blip.

                “I think I’ve got her.”

                “Where is she?” Matt asked.

                “Dead ahead about 2 miles. Man, oh man what a sight. Now that’s some kind of seamanship. Hear that Matt. We’re dead on her.”

                Matt picked up the radio microphone and called, “Fishing vessel Harmony, this is the CG44303…do you read, over.”

                A few seconds later Joe Brown from the Harmony responded. “Roger that 303.”

                “Yeah, Joe, 303, looks like we’re about 2 miles due south of your position. I do not have a visual yet, but we have you on radar. ETA should be maybe 10 - 15 minutes. Standby to take a line.”

                “Roger that 303…standing by.”

                Andrew was already preparing the tow line disconnecting the eye from its secured spot on the towing post directly behind the coxswains flat. He played out about fifteen or so feet careful not to tangle it into a knot. Next, he removed a smaller line with a weighted monkey’s fist knot attached to the end. He would attach this to the towing line and toss it over to the Harmony who use it to pull the larger line across to them. Ten minutes later, “There she is,” Johnson shouted, “just off the starboard bow about four hundred yards.”

                Matthew cut the throttles to half and turned toward them. “We’ll run past them, turn and come up on their port side down wind. Andrews, I’ll get you to within about thirty feet. You’ll have to give that line a good heave to make it through this wind. Stand ready.”

                Matt motored past the Harmony, and looped around behind them cutting the throttles to one quarter, just enough to ease alongside. The following swells caused both boats to roll over the top in a choreographed dance of machines. Matt turned the wheel and inched in closer. On the bow of Harmony stood a short stocky man wearing a wool watch cap and rain gear. He waved signaling he was ready to receive the line. Again, the swells lifted both boats in their waltz across the sea.

                “Andrews…next swell, give it a toss, but not until we’re at the bottom and leveled off.”

                Andrews stood at the ready bracing his knee against the side of the lower well area. Johnson stood ready behind the towing post the tow line wrapped in a crisscross loop around its stout cross member. For a third time both boats lifted over the top of a swell and floated into the trough behind. Andrews gave the smaller line a heave, a perfect toss, and it landed across the bow of Harmony whose crewman secured it and started pulling the tow line across.

                “Watch those props…keep the slack out.” Matt shouted at them. They already knew not to allow the line become slack and drift under the stern of the 303 for the props would surely suck the line in and foul the props. Within a few seconds thirty yards of line had been played out and the large eye was secured onto the towing station on the bow of Harmony. Her crewman waved and headed back inside the wheelhouse.

                Matt began to slowly move forward. Andrews now controlled the payout of line. The idea was to allow enough line out so both boats would ride the swells in unison, rising and falling at the same time. Not always easy, when the seas were angry.

                It took about 80 yards of line to get both boats to ride that way. Even so the swells were not always evenly spaced and there were times when Harmony disappeared behind a swell. The towline whipping and cutting through the water, snapping and popping as the strain on it tested its strength.

                “Alright guys, get behind the barrier. If that line snaps it will take your head off It hits you.” Matt spoke directly to them.

                The barrier was a simple arch extending about three feet wide and seven feet tall with chain link fencing material stretched across it. Its purpose was to prevent a snapped line from driving itself into the coxswains flat. A simple but effective deterrent.

                At their reduced speed because of the heavy tow. It was well over two hours later before they approached the number 2 buoy outside the bar. The overcast still hovered just above the surface and the distant ridge behind the sand dunes was obscured. All they could see was a thin white line of foam that marked the backside of the breakers that rolled up on the beach. Once they approached the number 2 buoy, they were about a half mile from the entrance channel. Yet Matt could not see clearly enough if there were breakers inside. Large swells continued to run with them and as they approached Andrews shortened the tow line to about 40 yards.

                Matt took a long look at the channel, then called the lookout tower.

                “Umpqua River Tower, 303.”

                “Go ahead Matt.”

                “Do you have an updated bar report. What have we got in there?

                “Last one is about an hour old, been socked in since then. We had a few random breakers in the channel, but the tide should be reaching its peak outward flow. There could be some in there now. I just can’t see anything.”

                “Roger that.”

                Johnson turned to Matt and asked, “What do you think. Should we risk it with Harmony in tow?”

                Matt took a deep breath and simply stared toward the channel entrance. It looked clear, but if a rogue breaker hit them as they were coming in, things might get ugly very quickly. His mind drifted again back to the Marc Eagle. Visions of breakers and screams chided him and his breathing started to increase. All he could hear, all he could see, were those nightmarish images from that night. His hand and shoulders began to shake. Andrews cast a worried look toward Johnson who returned the same.

                “Matt…Matt…you okay?” Johnson finally blurted out.

                Matt’s focus snapped back to the present moment and he looked up. “Yeah…yeah, I’m good.”

                “What’s your call?”

                “Let’s do this. Andrews tighten up the line bring them in another 10 yards or so.”

                Matthew backed the throttles slightly so Andrews could recover a few more yards of towline. Bringing them closer allowed a bit more control over their situation.

                “Once we get inside, we will bring them alongside and take them to the dock. Ready…here we go.”

                Matt pushed the throttles forward and picked up speed, the props straining against the heavy bulk of Harmony as it lagged behind. The once long swells became more compressed as they gathered over the shallower waters across the bar. Harmony began to drift to one side out of line with them. Matt radioed, “Keep her in line skipper, it’s going to be tight through here.”

                “You bet, sorry.”

                The 303 was lifted by a following swell and started to broach to starboard toward the jetty. Matt was slow to respond and allowed the boat to get too far to one side.

                “Whoa, Matt…that Jetty is getting close.”

                “I see it okay.” With that he worked the throttles and brought the 303 back in line. It took almost a full minute to cross the bar, but other than the close approach to the jetty, all went well. As they rounded the front edge of the training jetty, he called Harmony again.

                “Harmony, 303. Joe, once we are a little further in, we will bring you alongside so we can tuck you into your docking slip.”

                “Roger 303…no need to do that. I think we can nurse these engines long enough to take us home. Thanks for the tow…you did a good job.”

                A Harmony crewman tossed off the towline and Andrews rolled it back aboard and the crews waved as she motored by. A few minutes later, Matt pulled the 303 into the fueling dock for servicing. Chief Adams was standing there waiting.

                Johnson secured the engines and Andrews sprayed the hull down with fresh water. Matt continued to sit in the coxswain’s chair, physically spent far beyond what he should have been. As Johnson stepped off the 303, he walked up to Chief Adams.

                “How’d it go?” Chief Adams asked.

                Johnson stopped and looked the Chief square in the eye. You need to have a talk with Matt. He did okay, this time. But you need to have a talk with him. I don’t think he’s ready for primetime yet. He almost froze up out there.

                Chief Adams raised his head as he took in a strong breath. When Matt stepped off the 303, he walked over to him.

                “Get you something to eat and a hot shower, then come see me.”

                Matt stopped and threw a puzzled look toward the Chief. “Alright. Any reason.”

                “Just want a status report.” The Chief replied as he walked away.